Whats In A Name

A recent study out of the University of Pennsylvania ranked men's names from most popular to least over a particular stretch of time. The list went from "Michael" (most popular) to David (middle of the road) to the least popular names (Ivan, Ernest, Malcom etc.). They then looked at the likely hood of juvenile delinquency based on the names regardless of race or socio-economic background.  

"Results show that, regardless of race, juveniles with unpopular names are more likely to engage in criminal activity. The least popular names were associated with juvenile delinquency among both blacks and whites."

So next time you meet an Ivan...walk the other way. They are trouble.
I would like to congratulate all the Michael out there on a job well done. You have given us all a good name...or did the name give us a good name...but our parents gave us the good name....but they just did because everyone else was doing it.

Maybe its because every crime commited by a Michael was less likely to get solved.

"Do you know anything about the young man who did this to you....average height, between 16-25. Did you happen to hear his name???" Th police officer asked knowing that a name would help them catch the perp.
"A name? uhhh...I think I heard one of his friends call him Mike." the victim recalled hoping that the jerk who did this would be brought to justice.
"Michael?! Michael! Could you be any less specific? there are like a million Michael's out there....are you sure it wasn't Malcom? We know only one Malcom who fits this description. If you really think you heard Michael then I'm sorry this case looks like it will remained unsolved...but Malcom...we could have this closed by lunch...now think did you hear Malcom or Michael?"

Science and The Law 1,  Kids with Weirdo Names 0.

Defanniversary

It was one year ago today (Dec 13) that I defended my master's thesis.  I was just thinking about it today and wanted to relay a few memories.

I recall the week before the defense I would write a list of things I was shaky on and go study them.  This is a really tough task because if I was still shaky on it at this point it was probably because I had no clue where to start.  Its also tough because you have to be honest with yourself about what you just don't get.  

I also spent my time reading the thesis and looking for outrageous claims that I might have to defend.  this was a bad idea for a few reasons.  First, I wrote the thing and edited it.  I knew the whole thing pretty well and I defused most of my outrageous claims.  Second, reading my thesis was the one thing my examiners did not do.  That is not entirely true but they definitely skimmed over all the sticky wickets I found. 

As I was prepping the presentation I kept reminding myself that I actually did all this work and put my time in.  I wrote the thesis.  I know what I am talking about! There is no way they could fail me!  None of the examiners are jerks. They all like my supervisor.  This should be a lay-up.

I get into the examination room and set up the computer.  The first examiner comes in and asks me if I am feeling OK... I say "yeah i guess, just nervous".  She says "Oh cause you look pale".  I think to myself "Its December, I've spent the last month at my computer, I'm pale to begin with, I'm nervous.  Of Course I'm Pale! Are you some sort of a scientist or something?  Your powers of observation are ASTOUNDING!"  I say: "Oh, I feel fine. I'm sure its nothing. Thank You"

I continue to tell myself that I am fine.  They can't fail me.  I start the presentation.  no confused looks from the audience. No feverish writing...everything is going smoothly.  I think I got at least one laugh.  I finish the presentation.

The Questions Start.

They come out of left field.  If I spent 1 year preparing for this defense I would have never thought to research for these questions...I do alright.  I answer one question by telling the examiner that "normally i would try to B.S. my way through an answer but I will just tell you that I have no clue"

The defense is over...they ask me to leave so they can discuss my presentation and vote to pass or fail.  I step out the door and the only thing I can think is HOLY (expletive deleted) They Could Fail ME!

They passed me...If I had one tip for future defenders; skip the thesis re-read and work on your tan!

It's Science

As a scientist I am compelled to undertake experiments not for myself but for the greater good of humanity.  A few months ago, right here on this blog, I swore off TV as a waste of time (except for the exceptions).  I took it upon myself as an experiment in the human condition and I learned a lot about myself and the world at large.  For instance, did you know that in 1974, the Cleveland Indians hosted a "Dime Beer Night"  where they sold beer to the fans in Municipal Stadium for $0.10 each.  Unfortunately for the Cleveland Indians they had to forfeit the game because of "unruly" fans (please click the link and read more!).  Who could have seen that coming? In my time without TV I have blogged (NOTE:  linking to your own Blog?  doesn't get much worse than that!), I have read a book, I have read several issues of TIME magazine (not really worth it.  they always seems to be at least 1 week behind the real news), I have explored the world of pet ownership, I have attempted to work out a sabermetrics for my iTunes stats, I have gone car shopping, I have toyed with stop-motion movies (200 views...on the verge of Viral!) and I have taken far too many pictures of Downtown Charlottetown.  It truly has been a rich experience and I feel much better because of it.

But there comes a time in every experiment when you have to compare your results with another set of data.  That time begins NOW (or sometime between 9 am and 1pm)

For some reason the good people at Eastlink Cable have decided I am ready for a paradigm shift.  I'm not sure if they read my blog or if they noticed I wasn't using my cable as much as I used to or maybe I am just a valued customer but they got the message.  Today the "Cable Guy" hooked me up with EVERY channel of digital cable they have!  Now the offer only lasts for two months so I have to maximize my time with it to get proper data.  

Sometime in February, when HBO and TMN and The NHL network and NBC Seattle and Court TV and Much VIBE and BBC Kids fade to black, I will emerge from my cocoon.  Physically, I will be a pale shadow of my former self but mentally, I hypothesize that I will be so thoroughly entertained that I will never have to read a book EVER AGAIN (I will be also getting the Book Channel so I've got that covered)!  Remember, I am not doing it for myself,  I am doing it for you!

"Unfortunately", Christmas is upon us and I will be leaving Charlottetown for 2 weeks and there might be some holes in my data.  I will be in Toronto from Dec 20th - Dec 29th then I'll be heading out to Vancouver for New Years...and then back to Charlottetown.  I hope I get to see all of my readers on my whirlwind tour (this is likely seeing as at least 2/3 of my readers are my mom...Hi Mom! I can say 2/3 because she reads it once and then she calls me and we read it together so she can correct my spelling and grammar and I can explain to her why I think what I wrote was funny.  If my other reader needs an explanation on why I think what I write is funny please let me know!)

Stay tuned here...I have a few other blog worthy topics that I might get out soon.  Also i think  I will trickle out some "Favorite of '08" stuff.

Adult Stem Cell Breakthrough

As a scientist may I just say...You are welcome planet Earth!